Wednesday, February 20, 2008

cheerful happy rainbows make smilegood time

Apparently, most Japanese have never seen a real rainbow—there’s too much air pollution here.

On the other hand, they get to experience their own little rainbow inside the grocery throughout the year.

Take, for instance, KitKats:
In the Spring, there is Orange.
In the Summer, there is Blueberry and Lemon.
In October I found Acorn Squash for Halloween.
Again: There are no “pumpkins” in Japan. Some moron saw what is very obviously an acorn squash and decided to call it a pumpkin. As we know, acorn squash does NOT taste like a pumpkin. So imagine for the moment, if you will, an acorn squash-flavored KitKat. (Maybe you shouldn’t if you just ate.)

Now that we’re past Halloween, in preparation for Xmas, there are a flood of new flavors: White Chocolate, Dark Chocolate, and Mint. Oh, and lest we forget, Sweet Red BEAN. (Not as bad as the Acorn Squash, but still, weird.)

And I assure you, come January, we will once again see the ubiquitous Strawberry. Because in January, to use a Monty Python qu0te, you can’t swing a dead cat without hitting something made with strawberries.

Again: They wonder why their strawberries taste bitter, not sweet. Here’s an idea— They are a SPRING fruit. Plant them in the Spring!! Not in the dead of winter!!!

It’s been awhile since I’ve experienced a full year in Japan, so I’m sure I’ve missed some colors. Wait until Spring. They’ve GOT to do something with purple.

Maybe… Purple sweet potato flavor??
(Don’t laugh. It’s perfectly and absolutely possible.)

in case you're wondering, the title of this section is an example of typical JapEnglish (JapAnglish?) seen throughout the country

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